previously on Dumbgeons and Dragons.
You have just entered a caldera leading into the Well of the Dragon.
You guys hug up against the walls and these cult members converge on this central point.
And they are speaking Draconic.
Perfect, I speak Draconic.
They took the sacrifices out there and it's all gonna be real good.
When Tiamat gets here, I hope we get all the things that they've been promising us.
If they have sacrifices, that shit's all gonna be happening.
If they're needed, if we can fuck up their sacrifices somehow,
that will hopefully give us some time or fuck the whole thing up.
Totes.
The guard trick turns quickly and sees you duck down the hall and begins chasing after you.
As you keep going, you hear muffled voices ahead of you, but then it forks again.
Which way do you think we should go, Nularaaaa?
We go left, that's heading in, but it seems like there's a lot more tunnel options in there,
which means things are gonna get more complicated.
Nularaaaa, you look to the left and you lock eyes with the room of cultists who
are staring back at you.
As the cultists stand up from the table they're at and draw their weapons charging
towards you, we find ourselves back outside.
Faint, light auras can be seen leaving the deceased bodies from the battlefield,
rising up into the sky and into the heart of the cyclone.
Welcome to Dumbgeons and Dragons.
We're a D&D 5th edition actual play podcast and I'm your dungeon master Russ More
and with me today is Carla Johnson.
Who does not have a cookie despite there being a lot of talk about cookies
before we started recording.
But that's okay because I'm with my friends.
Also, I play Nularaaaa Moonbrook.
And Amy More.
That's me.
I'm neither here nor there about the cookie situation.
I have a beer in front of me so I'm pretty good
and I'm very happy to see my friends
because I feel like we haven't recorded in ages.
It's true.
And you're neither here nor there on the cookies,
but how many biscottis did you have today?
Oh, called out.
No comment.
Oh.
No comment on the biscotti and I play Thea Amastasia.
And Tom Laird.
I am kind of mad at myself because I made a bunch of cookies
before I left my brother's place
and then I didn't bring any to the airport with me
and all I wanted when I was there was a goddamn cookie.
Yeah.
And I play Flint Firebeard.
You know what, though?
They would have asked you at the airport
if you had anything with you in your luggage like food items
and then you would say no.
Which is exactly.
If you don't consider cookies to be food.
That's exactly what happened when we were going to Seattle
and then the lady was like, oh, do you have any food?
And I'm like, no.
And then I'm like, wait a minute, I have cookies.
So I was like, oh, I have some cookies.
I mean, not to call you out, Tom,
but you didn't even realize.
She said, do you have any food?
And we both said, no.
And then she said, do you have any gifts?
And you said, yes, cookies.
Yep, 100%.
That's exactly what happened.
You're like, hold on now, but does that
fall under the food category or the cookie category?
I was like a little so far out of her whole head.
It was funny.
She was pretty sassy.
She was pretty nice about it.
It was funny, but.
Oh, food.
See, I didn't intend on eating that.
So it's not food to me.
To be fair, I was bringing them exclusively for you guys.
They were gifts, so.
Yeah, it's true.
It was it did fall under more the gift category
than the food at that moment.
Yeah, it even fell under the gift for more category.
Are we seeing things can have more than one category?
If it's food, it can't be a gift.
If it's gift, it's obviously not food.
Well, it's just more so.
If it has wheels, it's automatically a car.
I don't like these like harsh dichotomies.
I'm more shades of gray in all things.
Yeah, I don't like where this is going,
but you know where where we do have different categories
is Patreon, Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cat.
You would think we planned that segue, but we did not.
Well, we didn't.
We're very proud of you right now.
I know, right?
So good, so good.
But we do have categories over there
and you can go check them all out.
They're also called tiers,
but you can go check them all out
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast
where for just a dollar a month,
you can see our lovely faces record this.
You can't see what I'm doing right now.
If you're not in the future.
Russ, out of curiosity,
what does let's say the $10 tier get people?
Don't put me on the spot like that, Tom,
but the $10 tier gets everything
that the $1, $2 and $5 tier get.
But also they get to name an NPC
and some NPCs that you might be familiar with at this point.
Flamikinskins, who was named by one of our lovely patrons.
Thaddeus, who was named by one of our lovely patrons.
Arvid of Innistrad, also named by one of our lovely patrons.
Reginald Thermopolis of the guild.
Such good names.
They are so good.
And these are like important characters.
Grancis?
No, Grancis is me, baby.
Grancin, Grancin is a patron named.
I don't know if I feel better or worse now
that Grancs came straight from you.
See, at that $10 tier, you get to mold the world.
And some of these NPCs we keep around for a long time
because we don't like change, people.
Once you're in, you're fucking in.
That's right.
Once we like you or hate you in the case of Grancis, that's it.
Follow-up question, Russ, about the $10 tier.
Dr. Magoose.
If I were to sponsor our podcast at $10 a month,
could I make a character named Grancis again?
I mean, there's already an episode named Grancis again.
Yeah, sure.
Okay, good question, Tom.
You got it, Tom.
I got to make sure we don't kick that $10 back to you.
Otherwise, it just seems kind of weird.
Okay, that's fair.
Patreon.com slash dumb dragon cast, come join the party.
Is one of the things that we dedicate an episode to a patron?
And one of the things is that we dedicate an episode to a patron.
I knew I was forgetting something.
We went on for kind of a long time.
I didn't expect the $10 throw out there, but that was good.
But today's episode is dedicated to a lovely patron named Forrest Demmon.
Thanks, Forrest.
Thank you.
You're amazing.
You are amazing.
You smell real nice.
And did you get your haircut?
Because it looks great.
Are you just doing something different?
I don't know.
Looks amazing.
I hear you've been running that 7th Sea or you want to run that 7th Sea game.
And I hear it's really fun.
So I hope that's going well for you and that you got to play it again.
Perfect.
Fuck it.
Let's play D&D.
Yeah.
The scene is silent.
We see a crew aboard one of the airships.
Down below, there is mayhem, chaos, a general massacre happening on both sides.
At the head of this ship, hanging over the edge, is Flameykins.
She has in her hand her crossbow and she aims and takes a shot down and hits
a cultist member who's jumping on top of a group of lesser trained military.
As the arrow strikes, the sound and screams and battle cries of the entire battle come back to us.
And her ship is broadsided by a blue dragon.
The ship is latched onto and torn apart as it begins to fall to the ground.
At the very last moment, Flameykins jumps off and lands on top of a giant,
reaching up to club a group of cavalry riding towards it.
She, with a gigantic chaos bolt, lets loose into the giant's ear and rolls down his back
as she joins the fray at the base of the mountain.
The ship and the dragon crash into the mountain, causing the tunnels and the caverns to rumble,
where we see Flint, Thea, and Nularaaaa facing down a group of cultists who are now charging towards them.
Roll for initiative.
Well that wasn't a good start. Uh, 13 for me.
15 for Flint.
16.
You got the highest of the three of us.
Oh my god.
Crushing it.
So that's how it's going to be tonight.
Alright, alright, I'm down for it.
I'm down for it.
Keep your head, Hot Shot.
So you guys are facing down, if you recall, three dragon wings and nine dragon claws.
Thea, you are up first.
Yeah, I am.
So the scene before you, you are basically staring into a narrow hall which opens into a chamber where these cultists are.
The hall is about five feet wide itself, and it's about 15 feet long.
But I can see them. It is a hallway.
Nice!
In the middle of it, I am going to cast fairy fire.
So each of them within a 20 foot cube, which should encompass all of them.
You said it's a 15 foot hallway.
Yeah, but they're in the middle of this chamber.
They have just stood up and are coming towards it.
So they're not yet in the hall.
Oh, can I run down the hall then?
Sure.
Yeah, I want to run closer to them so I can get them all in my 20 foot cube.
Can I do that?
You can get maybe like four of them.
Yeah, okay, I get four of them.
How far do I have to run to get four of them?
You have a 60 foot range on it so you don't have to run at all.
But you can run as far as you want.
Well, I won't run at all.
I will get as many as I can in my 20 foot cube.
I just whisper, glow motherfuckers!
And I cast fairy fire and they all start to glow in this very nice purply color.
What happens is all of those creatures that I hit is outlined in that beautiful light.
If it fails, a dexterity saving throw.
19, 16 and a 9.
One of them saves.
Okay.
Three of them do not.
So now, any attack roll against these affected creatures has advantage if the attacker can see it.
And these creatures cannot benefit from being invisible.
I can't remember if they can, but now they can't.
If they so desired, they could not.
It's not happening now.
So that was my...
And then I'm just going to move to the back of the pack.
I'm going to moonwalk to the back and be like, you guys got this.
You're welcome.
There is a call from the group as some of them begin to glow and they say,
Wait! You don't run!
And four of the other ones rush forward ahead of them.
Me don't run?
Yeah, they were talking to you.
Yeah, you don't run.
You don't run.
Please stop.
Why?
You look good, by the way.
No horseplay in the cavern.
No running, only walking.
Oh, okay. I'm sorry.
I saunter.
No, I said I moonwalked before.
Well, you are like a moon circle druid, aren't you?
I sure am.
Where is everybody positioned outside this hallway?
Like, are you like right in front of it?
Are you back a bit?
Like, the hallway that you're in is like 20 feet wide.
So there is room to move.
Thea has moved back, but the choke point of the hallway is only about five feet wide that they're running through.
I mean, I feel like I'm pretty close because I looked in that chamber, right?
So I'm probably because Thea looked the other way and I looked that way.
So as much as I don't want to say this because it's not my turn for a while,
I'm probably the closest because I was like...
Way to be honest, Carla.
You still got...
Oh, yeah. Oh, wait. They can't hurt me anyway.
I'm in the front. Don't worry about it, guys.
No damage to this girl.
You got this.
What's going to happen is I'm just going to roll a whole bunch as they kind of jump and fly over each other.
And no matter how many crit 20s I roll, they're not going to hit you.
I hope you roll so many.
I hope you get all of them out of your system.
There were two.
Oh, my God.
That would have destroyed you, Carla.
In a series of eight scimitar attacks that they rolled with advantage.
The first one runs forward and starts swiping at you,
but you just absorb this energy that is being brought upon you,
whether they hit or not.
The ones following him behind nimbly jump up and over each other.
So now we find one flying over top of you.
You passing through yours so you can take an opportunity attack on that one.
If you so desire.
Yeah, just give you the option.
Do you make like super weird like haha noises as they're hitting you?
Like, yeah, that feels good.
I don't know, like maybe.
But I honestly feel like it still is like, oh, fuck, because this is the first time I've used it.
So, like, it's probably still a little terrifying.
Like, at some point, this is going to stop working.
And it's still like, OK, like I still have time, but it doesn't feel comfortable.
It feels scary.
You're definitely taking like, you know, scimitar slashes and you feel them hit you,
but you're not absorbing any of the actual damage of it.
So while they're nimbly, like doing fucking amazing gymnastics over me,
I guess I will try to stab up with Dragon Slayer on the one that I can or whatever.
OK, well, I mean, that's a 13.
So this die has made it through two rolls and now is getting put away.
They've both been terrible.
Flint's turn.
Now, there's one in the in the tunnel section that the three of you are in.
The other ones are on the other side of Nulara and she is like stopping them from coming through at this moment.
OK, well, I'll just mosey on over to that one that's in the section and just.
Oh, hey, what's up?
Is that one glowing?
By any chance, you need to tell me.
No, they were told to move back.
Oh, I still thought they were wise to your magics.
All right. First one.
It's a 29.
Does that hit?
No. So that's going to be 17 damage on the first attack.
He is dead. So he lands, plants his feet, sticks the landing and then just catches an axe in the face.
The landing he really did a good job with.
I mean, he just looked very proud of himself, like he'd been working on it.
The judges were holding up the 10 placards for him before he got cut down.
Then they just moved the one away and it was just a zero.
So there's a bunch on the other side of Carla.
So am I able to like sideline up beside her and maybe like chop down past her on somebody?
Is that a thing I could do?
Yeah, it's like five feet wide.
Right. I'm not like it.
Well, I mean, they classify a person as taking up five feet.
But if she like shimmy to the side a little bit.
Yeah, sure.
So I'm like, hey, I'm coming at you.
Maybe you push her.
It's fine.
I mean, I also kind of want you still in the way, though, because you're eating all that good damage.
I know it is pretty great.
All right. Next one.
That's going to be a 28 to hit.
Yeah.
Now, do I have advantage on that one?
Still no. Those guys are back in the chamber.
So there are a total of like 12 guys and you've got access to three.
Perfect.
Including the one you.
So that's going to be 16 damage on that attack.
Oh, yeah.
So, yep, he's dead, too.
OK.
And can I reach a third one?
I understand if I can't.
I don't think he can because he was in front, would have pushed, you know, it would have been stopping the guy behind him.
So, no, can I ready my third action on the off chance someone comes close to me?
OK, you bet you can.
Perfect.
So, yeah, before your next action, if something were to happen, that would incur your your final attack.
Excellent.
Three of the Dragon Wings.
One of them is is a light with the fairy fire fly up and fly over top of everybody,
dropping down in the center of you and start swinging with their scimitars.
OK, so the first one is swinging at Flint.
So like he went close to me.
Yeah.
Well, as is this the one that I have advantage on or?
Sure.
OK.
As if you need it.
I mean, I might crit.
Yeah, you will.
Oh, I was so close to creating two guys.
So that is going to be a twenty eight.
And that's going to be that's almost full damage.
Nineteen damage.
He lands down behind you and you turn and take a big swing at him, cutting his chest open and spraying blood at yourself.
But it doesn't stop him.
The blood of your enemies swings back at you with his scimitar.
That's a 15 and a twenty three.
Twenty three will do it.
Six slashing damage and three cold damage.
So six in total because I take half of the physical damage.
The other two come out and land by the they both begin swinging at you with their scimitars.
OK, is a twenty one.
Well, yeah.
Second one is an eleven.
Twenty three.
Yeah.
Seven.
No.
So you take two hits really up and down.
Twelve slashing damage and three acid damage and three fire damage.
So a total of 18 damage.
Got it.
That's fun.
I'm mature.
No, it was a good response.
I assume there's more like coming towards the door.
So there is one on me or near enough to on me.
Yeah.
There's one that just struck Flint.
That is a light with very fire on the outside of the room.
Yeah.
There's actually there's actually two that are alike.
One of them is on the.
And then there's a bunch of ground dragon claws who are continuing to come forward towards you.
How close are they?
They're they're within reach now.
OK, then I'm going to attack one of those with the Dragon Slayer, which rolls a twenty one.
That will hit.
So Dragon Slayer has extra dragon damage.
Do these count as dragon creatures or like they are minor dragon creatures?
They count as humanoid human creatures.
Humanoid humans are the worst.
They're just merely merely called.
No, that's fair.
Speaking draconic.
It's what I assumed, but it never hurts to ask.
So that is twenty two damage.
Yeah, yeah.
He's dead.
Perfect.
Then I'm going to attack the other one because I think you said there was two that were kind of coming at me.
There are two within proximity.
So that is a light with fire, very fire.
It's twenty, not a crit.
This one's impressive.
It is nine damage.
That one is still alive.
Makes a pleading battle cry to signify that he has hurt real bad.
I hope Donnie is going to finish him off.
No breath weapon from a boy this time, because that would be risky.
But how about fifteen with a bite?
That'll do it.
Ten damage.
Donnie basically just muzzles him and gives a good old dog shake, snapping his neck as he drops to the ground.
You know what?
You make it sound kind of whimsical, dogs.
This is a dragon grabbing someone by the face and shaking them until they're dead.
Like the way a terrier would like shake a rat.
Like that's what he just did too.
But it's a bad guy, so it's fine, guys.
Don't even worry about it.
No moral issues.
He still has another attack, so maybe he can like spin and try and chomp the one that's attacking Thea.
There are two, but yes.
Well, one of those.
One is a light with fairy fire.
How about that one?
The other is not.
Do that one.
That one seems good, because that was a nine, but I'll try again.
Do it again.
Oh my god.
It almost went off the desk, but it didn't, and it was a seventeen.
Oh yeah.
That will hit, yeah.
I feel vindicated.
Fairy fire was a good choice.
It was a good choice.
This was a bad, bad roll, but five damage to that one from Mr. Donnie.
It all counts.
And Donnie has like maybe not ever had two successful attacks in a row.
So like he's pretty stoked on himself right now.
He's doing a little dance.
Yeah.
Yulara, make a perception check before the end of your turn there.
Okie dokie.
Nineteen.
Out of the corner of your eye, you think you see a flash of movement.
A dark shadow move further down the main tunnel in the direction where you came from.
Guys, I think someone's getting away.
We have to stop them.
Clint and Thea make a perception check as well.
I perceive, oh I perceive a twenty-five.
Seventeen.
Neither of you see anything.
Girl, what you talking about?
The remainder of the Dragon Claws appear to be just kind of pushing forward in the hallway now.
Like they are frantic in their attempt to try to stop you, but they can't get forward.
It's kind of dumb.
Two of them see this and they kind of hang back in the chamber.
They're like, dudes, like if we just hang out in here, maybe they'll come in
and then we can fight them not in a hallway, dumbasses.
They're like, oh yeah, that's probably a good idea.
And they disengage and they move back down the hallway, back into the chamber where they were eating their food.
Thea, you have two dragon wings attacking you.
One is alight with fairy fire.
The other is not.
Nularaaaa has just yelled out that someone is getting away.
But you did not see anyone in either direction.
I yell back, which way?
I saw a blur like going the way we came from.
What if it's something like going to warn them that we're here?
I'm on it.
Can I get on it?
You would have to disengage from combat, which would be your action.
But yes, you could be on it.
I'm going to be on it.
Okay.
So you're disengaging.
Can I disengage and turn into a winter wolf?
Tell me, is that an action or a bonus action?
It's a bonus action.
Ben, yes, you absolutely can.
Okay, I would like to turn into a winter wolf.
Thank you.
And so I'm going to wild shape and disengage.
And may I run my, I think it's like 60 feet.
So you run back down the hallway of which you came.
That gets you definitely to the T intersection.
Like you're like 40 feet from the T.
You can see down both directions, the one where you guys came from
and then the other one you chose not to go.
And you don't see any people.
Could you have been wrong?
Maybe.
It didn't seem like a person.
It was like a shadow, maybe something magical.
I'm done.
I just sit at the intersection.
Let's turn.
All right.
Can I roll a perception roll again to see if I maybe get a glimpse of this thing?
Sure.
I think it may have long passed.
And I've stuck you with two dragon wings.
I mean, if Seventeen didn't do it last time, this roll is not going to do it for sure.
How many of these things are nearby me?
Any of them glowing?
There are two dragon wings that were attacking Thea.
She turned into the wolf, disengaged and ran.
And one of them is glowing.
I'm going to head on up to the one that's currently affected by fairy fire.
And I'm going to attack it.
First one was a 21.
Second one, 22.
So mildly better.
That will hit.
Bank shot.
Oh, fuck.
That's full damage.
All right.
So that's 20 points of damage.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Tell me what happens when you extinguish his fire.
Yeah.
So he's glowing real bright.
So it's real easy to see him.
And I just like slash right on down on his neck.
And then he's not glowing anymore, which kind of makes me like blink a little.
So I wasn't expecting it just to turn off like that.
I'll turn to the other one that had been attacking Thea and take a chop at it.
So that's a 28.
15 damage on that one.
After easily dispatching the first one, you chop into the second one.
You hear bones crunch as it screams out and turns to face you.
And you have another attack.
I sure do.
Yeah, it's perfect time for me to hit him one more time if he's facing me.
So that's an 18.
That will still hit.
Oh, OK.
I don't think you can miss now.
I mean, it's entirely possible.
Missing is an option.
I just rolled a one for my damage, but I get to reroll that thanks to one of my fun skills.
So suck it, Russ.
Yeah, he yeah, he turns to face you and catches the axe straight in the face as he's
spitting the biggest loogie right at you and releases it just as the axe is
connecting.
So you get a big face full of loogie.
You know, that's fair.
You know what?
That's one of the things I don't.
I have a high tolerance for like gore and gross stuff on TV and movies.
Not a problem for me usually.
When I see people spit in other people's faces, I'm just like, yeah, so fucking
rude.
Like, sure, he just like carved this guy up with an axe, but he spit in his face.
That is just general human debasement.
Like, I do not like that.
I feel very strongly about it.
Continue.
Sad to say.
Had to share.
That's my turn.
Roll a d20 for me.
Hacking and getting spit on.
Flint's life in a nutshell.
Is that it?
Any bonuses or anything?
Nope.
OK, that's a nine.
Are you sure?
You're still Flint.
Right.
All those dragon claws are dead.
So it is new Laura's turn.
OK.
And there's how many in the room now?
Like three or something?
Yeah, they're like taunting you and being like, get in here.
Come on.
It's a great time.
Yeah.
Now there's two, three, four, five.
There are five of them in there.
OK.
It's a great time.
Come on over.
Exactly.
You're going to love it.
We're having the best party.
So good.
Look at these sweet snacks we brought.
I guess I will try to shoot one with my light crossbow.
I fail because that's a 10.
But it's OK.
I'm going to try again.
One, for your knowledge, is a light with fairy fire.
Oh.
So if you were aiming with that one.
Which I mean, why not?
I mean, I guess.
I don't like how.
Biggest target.
Yeah.
OK.
So that time was better.
It was a 21.
Is four damage.
OK.
You're like, we got great.
If you didn't want the Pringles.
You didn't like Chicago style popcorn.
What's wrong with you?
I mean, I want both of those things.
But let's just kill them first.
So second attack then.
Doesn't do well.
It is a 13.
Well, if you're attacking the same one.
It's also still advantage style.
Oh, yeah.
Gosh.
Advantage.
Man.
Thea.
I like this spell.
Fairy fire is dope.
Yeah.
So that is a 20 then.
So that is five more damage.
So now Donnie is going to try to recharge his breath weapon now that they are in a room
not with us.
And he does.
Donnie.
Get in there, Donnie.
30 feet.
Oh, only 15 feet.
Only 15 feet.
Can you reach them?
He's got to get into the room if he wants to hit any of them.
OK.
He'll go in the room.
There will be three within a specific area.
OK.
That's a nine.
That's a 13.
That's an 18.
18 obviously will take half damage.
The other two will fail.
So that is 21 damage except the one gets 10.
Nice.
The one who took 10 is on fire but still alive.
The other two scream out as their skin begins to melt and they fall to the ground dead.
I guess so he's going to try and I don't I don't want him to go in far enough to
try and bite them.
That seems crazy.
So he's currently at the.
He's like in the entry.
Right.
Like he still has.
Yeah.
He's only moved like 15 feet down this hallway.
So he could in theory move back.
But OK.
He can move back.
I can stand in the way in case any of my friends want to go in there.
Like the best nightclub bouncer ever.
Totally right.
Yeah.
I guess he like can like lift up also with them wings and whatnot.
Them wings.
So there are three guys.
One is on fire.
One is a light with very fire with two bows crossbows or two things stuck into them.
And they're like.
Could we.
Could we just pretend we didn't see you.
Well hello there.
It's me your Dungeon Master Russ More.
Just me today.
We got a little carried away in Monday's recording and didn't get a chance to do the interlude.
So you're stuck with me yet again.
I mean it's it's been that way for a long time but we like doing it all together.
So next week we're going to make sure that we get back to it.
Thank you for joining us for episode seventy five of Dumbgeons and Dragons into the well part two.
And if you've been with us this long and you're enjoying what we're doing we invite you to come join us over on our Patreon.
Patreon dot com slash dumb dragon cast where we're building such a lovely community with amazing people.
And we want you to be a part of that too.
Yes it is a monthly subscription.
Yes there is a cost to being a part of it.
It's it's a cost that goes directly to support the show to support the equipment to support us going and doing great things at cons and trying to get out and meet you.
The higher we get the more we can do that.
We're getting very close to our next goal.
I think we're only like fifty dollars a month away from that.
And at that goal we're going to run a live streamed one shot for our patrons where you can come watch give your suggestions.
We can just have fun playing a game together which we don't normally get we don't normally get to do because we don't stream our episodes like some other podcasts do.
But we're going to do that especially for you.
And then there's a whole bunch of other great stuff that comes up as we continue to move up grow stronger and get bigger.
I didn't write that part down just going off script here.
So Patreon dot com slash dumb dragon cast.
We hope to see you over there.
And if you are unable to join us on Patreon we totally understand it.
Money is a sticky thing.
It is.
So if you want to support the show but can't commit to Patreon right now we totally get that and invite you to leave us a rating and review.
And if you do we're going to read it right here.
Now normally with reviews lately we've been liking to get everybody reading them.
But because we've been on a roll doing it I'm going to read a couple for you here.
These first couple are from Facebook.
First one from Alejandro Khan who says fun podcast.
Interesting story.
Hilarious RPing.
Thank you Alejandro.
Also from Facebook.
Jacob Madden reviewed us.
These people are so amazing and they really get you involved in their adventures.
We try to.
We try very hard to.
So thank you Jacob.
Thank you Alejandro.
And we'll do a quick one here from Apple podcast.
This one from Special Olympian from the US says do yourselves a favour and listen to this podcast you doinks.
The actual review says I'll be honest the audio quality of the first show nearly drove me away.
But I'm glad that I stuck it out because this quickly became a weekly must listen for me.
Between the memorable NPCs and the chemistry of the cast you can't go wrong with this podcast.
Thank you Special Olympian for sticking it through that first episode.
We know it's tough.
That's all we can say.
So thank you.
Thank you for those reviews.
They warm the cockles of our hearts.
And I know if Tom and Carla and Amy were here they would say very much the same thing.
If you can leave us a review on Apple podcast, Stitcher, Podchaser, Podknife, Facebook, any of those we will read it right here.
Thank you so much.
Links for everything mentioned today can be found in the description including the Dumbgeons and Dragons Discord and the Reckless Play Guild Facebook group.
Where you can get to know us as well as some other great podcasts within the Facebook group.
The Discord specifically for Dumbgeons and Dragons.
So go check out the links down in the description and come join us.
Final thanks to Sirenscape for some of the amazing atmosphere and sound effects in today's episode.
Make sure you check them out at Sirenscape.com to bring your games to life.
The next episode will be out next Wednesday, March 27th as Flint, Thea, and New Laura continue their trek through the Well of Dragons towards the Cult of the Dragons ritual.
Speaking of which, we gotta see what's going on with these cultists over here that look like they're gonna try and talk their way out of this.
Hope you enjoy the rest of the episode.
You have a great week.
We'll talk soon.
We'll go the other way.
And it'll be okay.
It's kind of directing this towards you, New Laura.
We're not gonna let you go.
But...
But what if we put our weapons down and gave you the snacks that we had as a token of good faith?
Flint, what do you think? Should we just like tie these losers up and leave them here or should we kill them?
I mean...
Seems unsporting now, to be honest.
If they're kind of throwing in the towel, it doesn't really seem fair.
But at the same time, we kind of got this thing that's happening, regardless of whether or not we treat them with respect or not.
Oh, maybe they can help us on their way out.
How so?
We can help. We're super, we're super great at helping.
Well, you know, like we're looking for the way in there and maybe the one that isn't as populated as another one might be a good heads up.
Yeah, how well you guys know this layout. What are your jobs here, exactly?
Well, I mean, we're guards for the prisoners.
Where are the prisoners?
Wait, there's prisoners?
Well, the other room across the hall looked like it had had prisoners in it.
Yeah, no, I mean, they're the prisoners got taken.
Yeah, that's I mean, they got taken.
So there's no prisoners anymore, which is why we're in here having snacks.
Where the prisoners get taken?
To to the sacrificial chamber.
That was a while ago, though, so don't know what happened to them since then.
And where is this sacrificial chamber from here?
Yeah, no, there's like there's, you know, there's a prisoner behind you there.
There's two more prisoners.
So if you go up and you take your first left and you follow that down a ways, Bob's your uncle.
You get to you get to the prisoner chamber.
A follow up question, is this prisoner chamber near wherever Tiamat's doing her thing?
Well, I mean, it's kind of winsome, winsome, getsome.
So you sacrifice the prisoners and it helps Tiamat come back.
So then it's close by. Yep.
I mean, you could have just said yes to the previous question.
I'm a man of man of many words.
Which apparently are winsome, getsome.
I feel like that would be on the side of a Korean like blogging.
Totally. So can we go now?
I mean, no, you can't go. That was never on the table.
All right. Then we could.
Then he rushes forward and tries to swipe at you.
Oh, all right. Good. Let him try. No more explanation.
I mean, he hits you, but. Does he really?
Yeah, he hits you, but it doesn't do anything.
It's back up to Thea, who is down the hall.
Can I see if with my keen, wolfy senses, can I smell anything in the hallway?
An investigation. An investigation.
Is there anything in particular you are sniffing for?
Oh, well, no, because I rolled a four.
So I take one more look.
You see no new signs of movement or tracks of any sort.
And I back away until I'm clear from like I didn't want to turn my back to a T
if someone was like invisible and like just ready to like fuck with me.
So, yeah, I back up until it is safe to turn and sprint back into the action,
because I hear the battle cry of someone but heard about not being able to be let go or something.
OK. Do I get there? How far do I get?
I ran. Well, you get back. Yeah, absolutely.
Oh, cool. New are still blocking the hallway, though.
Can I jump over her?
You'd also be jumping over one of the other guys.
So, yeah. OK.
Is there a guy on the other side I could bite?
Well, he's going to take a swing at you as you jump over top.
But I'm so stealthy.
It's not a matter of stealth. He sees you jump over top of them.
Fine. Take your swing.
Oh, I like this whole new stance. Seven.
No. So you jump over and land sure footed on the other side.
It's just the one that she's attacking or is being attacked by Nulara.
And then there are two more, two more in the room.
Yeah. So I'm going to jump over Nulara and the asshole.
And then I'm going to blast the other two that are in the room just because I don't like the shape of their cut of their gym.
Sure. Yeah. Shape of the cut of their gym.
You know what I mean. Six. Seven.
That's negative to both of those. So you take four D8 cold damage.
Sixteen cold damage.
One of them who was previously on fire was like, oh, finally.
Oh, yeah. The fire flames are out.
You're welcome. Freezes in spot.
And the other one does as well and both fall forward and shatter on the ground.
I look back and I go, I killed something, guys.
I give thumbs up, but Flint is up. Nulara is in the way.
Can I just go up and take his weapon from him?
He didn't seem too keen to, like, fight us anyway.
Yep. You could try to disarm him. You have to grapple him.
Done. I got plus five to my strength.
You're so burly and strong. It's no problem.
That's going to be a 19, Russ.
Oh, yeah. He's he's definitely grappled.
And you just knock the weapon. Just going to rip his weapon out of his hand.
Maybe slap him lightly.
You do so. He takes. No.
He takes one damage and is just he feels real bad about himself.
It's more emotional damage.
Why are you destroying him by not destroying him?
It's a power move. 100 percent.
I feel a little bad, but he like really is on the wrong side of history here in this whole rise of Tiamat thing.
So, you know, are you going to are you going to do anything with him?
What now? No, I think we should just take him with us.
I can just hold him the whole time by the scruff of his neck.
OK, so he can direct us on which way to go.
Yep. Great. Got it.
So you have a prisoner now.
We take prisoners. It's a new thing we're trying.
I mean, we're not in like the biggest fight of our lives.
So why not try something new and some extra like tag along baggage?
I mean, we don't have to.
We can just drop them on the floor and cast them in character.
Don't worry, guys. We can kill him any time.
Like if he starts to be a nuisance, we don't have to bring him with us.
So I promise I won't be a nuisance.
Mostly you don't have to kill me, although they'll probably kill me if they see me with you.
So, well, you better hope they don't see you then.
Better keep it quiet.
OK, I'll be quiet.
Yeah, the easier you make this for us, the easier we'll make it for you.
OK. I've been silent this whole time, so you don't know which side.
I mean, I can guess.
He is a little bloodthirsty. Exactly.
I very rarely get to kill stuff, you guys.
I'm like pointing at the rope to feel like, huh?
Well, should we should we head over to the sacrifice chamber, see if there's any survivors?
Seems as good a place as any. Maybe we can stop the sacrifice in time.
Seems doubtful, but it's worth a shot.
What's this? What's this guy's name, Russ? Does he have a name?
I don't know. He doesn't have a name tag.
If only there was a way you could ask somebody their name.
I shake him a little bit. What's your name?
My name? Stephen?
He paused too long. It's not his real name.
With a P-H or a V?
P-V.
Oh. Oh, wow. I was not expecting that.
All right, Stephen, where are we going?
Well, where do you want to go?
So we want to go to that chamber. So down and to the left, I believe you said.
I don't know why you're playing dumb now.
Bob's my uncle, something about that. You don't know about my family.
Down and to the left. Yep. Yep.
I don't trust him. I want to eat him.
Down and to the left, he says with confidence.
So the wolf doesn't eat him.
Flint, do you want to go in the front with Stephen here and make sure?
All right, Stephen, here we go.
Yep. OK, great.
You with marching order here?
I guess I'm leading.
OK, I'll be in the middle with Donnie.
OK, I like it. Sure.
To remind you of your current position, there was the chamber of which you were fighting in.
There was the one across the hall that looked like it was kind of had a bunch of just like grossness and garbage and stuff in there.
As you continue walking down, you pass by a hallway on your right.
As you kind of glance down it, you see what looked like piled up bodies inside of this room.
So none of them appear to be moving?
Looking down the hall, it doesn't appear so, no.
Stephen, what are the bodies for?
They were prisoners.
All right, what now?
Some of the sacrifices then.
Yeah, some that didn't make it, you know.
I mean, sacrifices traditionally don't make it.
Well, no, see, we took the rest of the prisoners to the sacrifice.
Those are the prisoners that we held on past expiration date.
OK, I am wanting to kill Stephen more and more.
This is like some gruesome shit.
Hey, New Laura, does your dagger need a refill?
What's the deal there?
Yeah, can you refill that with anything?
I don't know.
Does my dagger need a refill?
And I like put my hand on the hilt.
The gems do not glow?
My thinking, I mean, I def want to kill this guy now because it's like he's so bad.
And then just throw him on top of those baddies.
I was forgetting how bad the cult was.
But I want to get where we need to go with him before killing him.
OK.
Right?
So we haven't announced that we want to kill him.
Yes, no.
That is at least what New Laura's thought like seeing that reminds me like, oh, this isn't like a one on one person.
We're having a conflict.
This is like a bloodthirsty ending the world murderous cult.
Oh, yeah.
Shit.
Right, right, right.
Cool, cool, cool.
This is why we don't take prisoners because they're all horrible.
Remember, we took a prisoner that one time, but then she ended up dying.
Yeah.
I think we took her from someone else, too.
We're not great with prisoners.
Not great.
So we're just not responsible enough to have pets.
This is happening in character.
What's happening?
That was just like, well, that was just my thinking.
That was my in character thinking.
Like, I have turned the corner and definitely want to kill this guy.
But I want to try and get to that sacrifice chamber first.
OK.
So this wasn't the sacrifice chamber or was the sacrifice chamber?
It's where we held them.
It's just the kind of jail.
All right.
So let's keep going to the sacrifice chamber then, Stefan.
All right.
So you leading the way there, Flint, with Stefan.
You get there is a turn to the left.
And he's like, yeah, it's just down this way.
And as you step down that way, you hear echoing through the halls.
The jacquorn kick back on.
And it begins shaking rocks loose from the ceiling.
I look at Donnie and I say, you OK, buddy?
Yeah, yeah, I kind of tuned it out a while ago.
It's not...
I still feel like we checked in on you.
It's a whole, you know, jacquorn thing.
Just want to make sure you're OK.
Yeah, no, they're specifically targeting dragons who feel like
this is a great thing.
And not me.
Not me.
So glad to hear it, man.
So glad to hear it.
Nularaaaa, make a perception check.
24.
You guys keep walking.
Nularaaaa, you feel like you hear something behind you.
So I say, did you guys hear that?
Can you hear that?
And I, like, kind of have stopped and I'm, like, not totally turning around.
You two don't hear Nularaaaa.
Nularaaaa turns and looks behind her and then looks back.
And she is in a dark, silent hallway.
Flint, Thea, Donnie, and Stefan are not with her.
You two don't hear her say anything because she doesn't say anything.
And you continue walking down the hall.
Some of the music in today's episode is by Kavin McLeod of Incompetech.Filmmusic.io
and Scott Buckley at ScottBuckley.com.au.
Sound effects can be found at BoomLibrary.com and at Sirenscape.com.
Also looks like Amy would like to disengage from something else right now.
The smell my dog is making.
I'd like to disengage from this.
This is me looking at a map, not him stumbling.
Yeah, so he's still believable.
He's not killing time as someone steps up behind us.
Let me just do this dance over here while I'm away.
Looking at a map to give you direction.
Yes, I know where my D8s are.
I like that no one was questioning whether Amy knew where her D8s were.
She definitely knows where they are, guys.
She definitely knows.
She feels like she hears something.
You have a feeling.
There's a big Drakorn with falling things.
That's what I meant.
It's like a foghorn.
I'm sorry, Andrew.
Dumbgeons & Dragons is a Dumb Dragons production.